Unplugged

As I write, I am listening to Jason Mraz do a live and somewhat goofy version of Rocket Man.

I wrote this totally awesome post to absolutely nobody but myself (like always) to try to capture my "now" feelings about why I have chosen to suddenly make my blog viewable to the public. Then I hit the wrong key on my keyboard (and still have NO clue how I did it) and deleted the entire post. So the drive is now gone, of course lol. Nobody likes having to repeat themselves!

So here's a shorter, make my point version:

I like my music unplugged. Not everyone does, and that's totally cool. I love that everyone is different, it makes my world turn. But for me, stripped down to the bare essentials, honest and soulful without all the layers added on is the best kind of tunage there is. Faith Hill and Santana did this incredible version of Breathe once. I looked forever, and finally found it here. It was so simple, and so beautiful. I realize that Carlos Santana isn't exactly "unplugged," but the vibe was there. I love the imperfections that can only be found in that kind of music. That's just the kind of music that I dig....and just the kind of girl I am I guess.

For some people, unplugged would also imply unhinged, or crazy. These people probably do not enjoy the same music as I do. Those people will more than likely find myself equally unhinged. My taste in music is definitely not shared by everyone, just as much as my way of being isn't going to please the masses. But that's OK, because it's my blog, and I think the point of these things is that it doesn't matter if people like what they read, because they don't have to keep reading if they don't want to.

I started this thing last year not knowing if I would ever post again after the first day. I filled cyber-pages with my thoughts and opinions and freakouts for months, and after reading my own blog, I know myself better. I kept it private because for the short time that it was public, C used it to try to manipulate me, and at the time I was so confused and fucked up that I was too easily emotionally blackmailed. And now I realize that there is nothing that I have written that the people who I love don't already know, and nothing in these posts that I have ever tried to hide.

So I read other people's blogs. It feels a little creepy, because I haven't been as brave with my own thoughts. And my new self thinks this: I am who I am. I'm Unplugged. I'm honest, I'm reflective, and I make huge mistakes just like anyone else. So I figure that if anyone stumbles upon this, starts to read and wants to come back for more, then why not?

I can't promise life lessons, humor or any real sort of entertainment. But if you happen to enjoy my particular brand of "Unplugged," go ahead and read.