Big Rocks

Today's Tunes:

Faith Hill - Cry

Tied Together with a Smile - Taylor Swift cover by this Rachel chicky - she's pretty good!

I was perving a friend's facebook profile today. He's an interesting bloke. Knows what he wants, knows what he SHOULD want, and pretends they are the same thing lol....don't we all. He's got a note on there, telling a story that I heard from my class instructor 2 weeks before C and I split up.

The story is about a professor in front of his philosophy class. The professor takes a mason jar, places it on the desk, and begins to fill it to the top with big rocks. He can only get like 5 or six in there until the rocks reach the top of the jar. He asks the students if it is full, and they respond, "yes."

He then silently takes a bag full of pebbles, and pours the pebbles into the jar. He shakes the jar, and the pebbles roll in between the spaces of the rocks. He asks the students if the jar is full, and they agree, "yes."

He then takes a box of sand, and wordlessly pours it into the jar. The sand fills the rest of the spaces. He asks the students if the jar is full. They respond with a confident "yes." The professor then takes out 2 cups of coffee, and pours them both into the jar, filling the empty space between the sand.

The professor explains that the jar represents one's life. The rocks are the important things - family, health, friends and passions. If everything else in life were lost and only they remained, one's life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter, like a job, car, house etc. The sand is everything else---the small stuff. If you put the sand in first, there is no room for pebbles or rocks. This is true of life as well. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

My buddy's story went on to provide some inspirational insight into what you should be doing with your time - seeing your doctor regularly, playing with your children, golfing that extra round - and was really beautiful. The professor ends the lecture by explaining that "The coffee just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem,there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

When I heard the story in class, it was equally insightful, but followed by this gruesome task of writing down the 16 most important things to me (easy) and then crossing them out until I had 5 "Big Rocks." I remember agonizing over the fact that I had to cross out my wedding. My final list was: C, J, Cats, Mom & Music. I felt so confident in that list. Like they were my "big rocks" and that was important.

So obviously I'm a rock down since my separation. And J's since moved out of town, which doesn't make her any less important, but she certainly takes up less of my time. She's never around anymore. And mom's got this boyfriend now who she's always with. These are all really positive things, and I am totally happy for them. But obviously feeling a little lost in the shuffle. My best friend is getting married. My MOM may be getting married. I'm not sure what I'll be doing next, but it sure as hell will NOT be getting married.

Alice came to the fork in the road.

"Which road do I take?" she asked.

"Where do you want to go?" responded the Cheshire cat.

"I don't know," Alice answered.

"Then," said the cat, "it doesn't matter."

- Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland